WEEKLY SERMON
October 18, 2009 - Pentecost 20
Brothers and sisters in Christ,
In our gospel reading today Jesus was asked a question about
marriage and divorce. Part
of his answer included the phrase, “at the beginning.”
He was referring his listeners back into time, not just back to
the time of Moses, but all the way back to creation, back to when God
brought this world and the human race into existence.
That’s where any study of marriage and family life has to begin,
at the beginning.
AS Bible-believing Christians we know that the first chapter of
Genesis gives us the actual account of how God used his explosive,
creative power to bring this world into existence.
He simply spoke the word and in six normal, evening and morning
days, the world was completed.
And it was all very good.
Things were just as God intended them to be, perfect in every
way, shape and form. That’s
chapter one.
Chapter two then goes into more detail about how God in his love
prepared the world for his highest creation, man.
The Garden of Eden was all set.
Then God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed
into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living being.
Adam was that first man’s name.
The world was ready for Adam to live in and to enjoy.
He was its caretaker, the one who was given authority over all of
it.
But now we come to a point in that sixth day of creation when God
established one last thing.
Today that something seems under attack from several different
directions. Like the rest
of creation it is corrupted by sin.
This thing that God established is not very highly esteemed or
considered sacred anymore.
And yet it is important for all of us, no matter what our status in
life, to hear and learn about, to put into practice, to instill in our
children and families:
MARRIAGE AS GOD INTENDED IT!
We shall see that God intended marriage to be for one man and one woman,
that it is a commitment to love, and that it is a permanent union.
I.
As I said, God had created one human being from the dust of the
ground, the man, Adam. Now,
God obviously had man’s best interests at heart.
He is a God of love.
He seeks ways to help man, to make life the best it can be for man.
Here we see God evaluate the situation and know that there is
something more that the man needs.
It is not good for the
man to be alone. I will
make a helper suitable for him.
What does God do first?
Does he form another human from the dust of the ground?
Not at all! He
brings all the animals to Adam so that the man could give them a name.
God brings the zoo to Adam in order for him to find a suitable
helper. Seems kind of
silly, right? Well, we know
that God doesn’t do things in a silly way.
This job of naming the animals had a very important purpose.
Let me illustrate.
How do you ever find out that you need something?
When do you realize that you need to buy a ladder?
Isn’t it when you’ve got to clean the leaves out of the gutter,
or paint the ceiling in the bedroom?
You come across a situation where you learn that something is
missing from your life, that you are in need.
That’s what God was doing here with Adam.
BY having all the animals parade past him the man would see that
he was alone, that there wasn’t another creature which was just like
him. God wanted Adam to
discover that something was missing from his life.
Once he realized this basic need, the better he would appreciate
God’s solution. He would
understand it as a gift from his loving Creator.
Once Adam realized that need, God then causes a deep sleep to
come over him. He takes one
of Adam’s ribs and it says that he literally built a woman from that
rib. He makes a helper
suitable to the man, one who is like him, one with whom he can share
life. Then in simple
elegance Scripture says, And He
brought her to the man.
With love and joy God presented Adam with the precious gift, a woman
who could share the blessings of creation and be his wife.
One man, one woman, brought together by God – marriage as God
intended it.
That’s the way marriage is still supposed to be today.
We are not talking about something that is just a man-made custom
or social development, something that people can take or leave as they
see fit. God instituted
marriage for the good of mankind in this world.
As we saw, from the beginning God intended marriage to be
something special, something beautiful.
As was the case for Adam, it is not good for us to be alone
either. Some people may
have that situation of being alone forced on them by death or divorce or
by the unrealistic standards of society or by some other circumstances.
Some may choose to remain single for one reason or another, as
the apostle Paul did. But
God has given all of us that inner desire to be with people, to have
relationships with one another.
We like getting together.
We like sharing our lives with one another.
In one sense we all have that “herd” mentality.
Marriage is one way God has established to satisfy that feeling
of not wanting to be alone.
But who to share that life with, that’s the question.
God made for Adam a helper suitable for him.
The key word is suitable.
The Hebrew word here means counterpart or corresponding to, sort
of like a mirror image.
This isn’t an exact replica, but someone who fits together as closely as
possible. And we’re not
talking about Adam and Steve or Annie and Eve.
God intended marriage from a man and a woman, not any other kind
of arrangement. Your spouse
is to be someone with whom you can achieve a mental, physical and
spiritual balance. Picture
two gears of a machine whose teeth do not grind against each other but
match in perfect harmony.
They may not be exactly the same in every respect, but they work
together, think alike, share similar interests, similar goals and
spiritual values. A
mother’s tender touch is a perfect complement to the father’s firm hand
in raising children. They
say that opposites attract.
But that’s not what God showed in establishing marriage.
Suitable to one another, that’s what he intended.
Other parts of the Bible also show us that this one man and one
woman situation has different roles assigned to each.
God says her that the woman is to be the helper.
Paul says that she is to submit to her husband, that he is the
head of his wife. That’s
how God himself intended it.
But this is not a master/slave relationship, where the husband
dominates and the wife cringes.
The husband is to use his authority out of self-sacrificing love
for his wife, just as Christ loved the Church.
The wife is to willingly submit, just as we Christians submit to
our head, our loving Savior, Jesus.
He is no tyrant. He
gave his very life, he sacrificed it all for the sake of his bride.
So the machinery of marriage runs most smoothly when both husband
and wife function in the roles God has given them.
II.
And the reason they will do so, even though it goes against our
selfish, sinful nature, goes against the pagan philosophies of our
world, is because they are making a commitment, a commitment to God and
to each other to love.
That’s at the heart of marriage as God intended it.
But what kind of commitment is that?
What kind of love are we talking about?
Notice how Adam responds when God brings the woman to him.
He joyfully acknowledges that she is the perfect answer to his
need. She is different from
him and yet perfectly suited to be his helper and companion.
This is not bone of my
bones and flesh of my flesh.
Adam treasures his wife as something truly special.
God did not force her on Adam.
He brought her to the man so he could choose her to be his wife.
That’s what commitment is all about.
That’s what the highest kind of love is all about.
It’s the love that makes a choice on the basis of understanding.
This isn’t a choice based on infatuation, something decided on
the basis of physical attraction.
Sad to say, that seems to be the most highly sought commodity in
a spouse today. What does
the other person look like?
Are they handsome or beautiful?
Or what do they bring to the table financially?
Not here. Adam’s
choice isn’t one based on selfishness.
Nor is it forced on him.
Now, someone might say that Adam didn’t have a choice.
Who else was there?
But he did. He took Eve as
the spouse God intended for him.
There were no strings attached, no conditions to be me, no trial
living together to see if they were compatible or not.
He made the deliberate selection to care for her, to share his
life with her. He chose to
love her. And while it is
not stated explicitly, Eve’s commitment to Adam is at least implied.
They made the conscious decision to love one another in marriage.
It’s no different today.
Arranged marriages, marriages based solely on the heat of
passion, or on the financial status of a person, that’s not a marriage
as God intended it. It’s to
be a commitment to love your spouse.
It’s a choice of understanding.
Before God you are saying that you will share every last bit of
your life with this person, that you will be willing to put your whole
being into the success of your marriage.
You need to know your intended spouse when you make that
commitment. It’s a decision
not to be entered into lightly, not to be entered on the basis of only
physical, outward considerations.
And once in your marriage this commitment is something to be put
into practice. It will be
challenged. Marriage is a
microcosm of society. The
sinful world challenges it at every turn.
Sinful human beings don’t always stick to that commitment as God
wants them to. It takes a
commitment of unselfish love, patterned after the love of Jesus for his
bride, the Church. That’s
what God intended in marriage.
III.
And as we learn especially from our gospel lesson, God intended
marriage to be a permanent union.
Moses here in Genesis emphasizes the union aspect,
For this reason a man will leave
his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become
one flesh. Leaving and
cleaving, using the old translation of the Bible, that is what literally
takes place. The Hebrew
word for this union means ‘sticking’ together, a soldering together,
like two metals melted together to form one tight, permanent bond.
Before marriage, the closest ties are between parents and
children. In making an
unconditional commitment to one another, the husband and wife make the
union between them their first and foremost commitment.
Their love for each other must take precedence over their love
for parents or anyone else.
In this way a new family unit is formed.
It is a union so complete that the two become one flesh.
This unique union is expressed through sexual intimacy.
Their bodies belong to each other for mutual satisfaction.
Outside of marriage this is a misuse of one of God’s greatest
gifts. But within a
marriage it is something truly wonderful and has God’s blessing through
the creation of children.
But being of one flesh means more than sex.
It demands a oneness of purpose.
How often a marriage ends in divorce because the husband and wife
do not walk together, but go their separate ways.
And we especially emphasize that oneness when it comes to
spiritual matters. Husband
and wife can be joint heirs of eternal life when they are one in Christ,
one in making him the ultimate head of their marriage.
IT can’t be a perfect union of man and woman where there is not
union with the Savior.
Finally, being one flesh demands permanence in marriage.
When a marriage is broken by divorce, violated by unfaithfulness
or a desertion of that commitment to love, the only result is great
personal harm to both individuals.
It is sin as Jesus clearly pointed out in our gospel reading.
Divorce is never acceptable to God.
It’s a tearing apart of something only God has the right to end.
Marriage as God intended it is to be a permanent union.
That’s his prescription for a happy marriage.
It is a special gift from God when a man and woman are united in
holy matrimony. Because our
Creator has established the guidelines surrounding it, it dare not be
entered lightly. Nor should
we look at marriage as something to be resented, a necessary burden of
life. The blessings of
marriage are wonderful when used properly, when practiced only within a
marriage. Yes, mistakes
will be made by all of us when it comes to our marriages.
We will sin against each other.
But that’s where a Christian marriage can really shine.
Forgiveness, love for Christ and his Word, those things can be
taught and practiced and learned so easily and wonderfully within
marriage the family. That’s
why it is important to make Christ a regular part of your marriage.
Study that Word and apply its truths to make yours a better
marriage. That’s the only
way to continue on to the goal that all Christians should have in
marriage, to make our marriage as God intended it.
AMEN.